Santa Claus is coming to town

"Santa Claus Is Comin' To Town"

When you take a good hard look at the Santa Claus Mythos, you realize he's a creepy, spooky freak with some very disturbing moralistic obsessions. Let's, for the moment at least, set aside the racially pure work force and the fact that he lives in an isolated compound outside the jurisdiction of international law. For the moment, we'll also ignore the fact that he only gives to people celebrating the Christian extensions to what is otherwise a Pagan holiday. (Do some research, there's precious little about the holiday we call "Christmas" that isn't Pagan in origin. The tree, gift exchange, most the food and even the idea of a Pageant performed by the kids are all of Pagan origin) Let's look at a single song, just for starters.


"Santa Claus Is Comin' To Town"

You better watch out
You better not cry
You better not pout
I'm telling you why
Santa Claus is coming to town
Santa Claus is coming to town
Santa Claus is coming to town

We start off with an list of behaviors to avoid because "Santa" is coming to town. Clearly, there will be unfavorable consequences if this figure is displeased. Since the behaviors are ones that are considered rude and inappropriate ways to express disagreement anyway, it's not necessarily a terrible threat, it just sounds a lot like the old "Wait until your father gets home" or the "You be on your best behavior while we're at Grandma's". So far, it's more parental than anything else.

He's making a list,
Checking it twice;
Gonna find out who's naughty or nice.

Now we're stepping into unpleasant territory. He's making a list of the people who behave the way he likes, and the people who behave in a manner he does not like. While still a bit parental, we're getting into "stalker" or "Big Brother" territory. We don't know what the list is for, or what will happen to the people designated as "Naughty" on said list.

Santa Claus is coming to town
Santa Claus is coming to town
Santa Claus is coming to town

An increasingly ominous refrain. He's coming, and he's making a list.

He sees you when you're sleeping
He knows when you're awake
He knows if you've been bad or good
So be good for goodness sake

Now we're getting into some disturbing content. This is a clear statement of 24 hour surveillance. Unconstitutional if the government does it, quite illegal if an individual or a corporation does it. You are being watched, and your actives logged for later review. Not only that, but you're being judged based on these actions.

Privacy concerns are ignored by this "Santa" as blatantly as if he were a member of the Bush Administration.

Notice that there are NO options for appeal or introduction of extenuating circumstances. The ONLY indication we have of the parameters of how we are being evaluated come from the beginning of the song and the list of prohibited behaviors above.

With little tin horns and little toy drums
Rooty toot toots and rummy tum tums
Santa Claus is coming to town
Santa Claus is coming to town
Santa Claus is coming to town

Here we have a claim that his arrival will be noisy and easily noticed, despite all of the propaganda we've heard to the contrary of him sneaking around and dropping down chimneys. What's the message here? Is this intended to sooth us with claims of the process being in the open, or is it a slip in the Claus Propaganda machine?

He sees you when you're sleeping
He knows when you're awake
He knows if you've been bad or good
So be good for goodness sake

A repetition of just how pervasive the surveillance really is. The message is clear. YOU ARE BEING WATCHED.

You better watch out
You better not cry
You better not pout

Yet another repetition of the prohibited behaviors. Notice what you're not allowed to do. You're not allowed to express dissent or dissatisfaction with the world around you. When first stated, it was fairly innocuous, but after the lines regarding pervasive surveillance, it becomes downright frightening.

We're not just talking about being punished for making a scene, but for pouting when you're otherwise alone. This is clear monitoring of your behavior even when you would otherwise have an expectation of privacy. Is your diary being read to check for signs of dissent? You're clearly not permitted to "Cry" or "Pout" even when alone. This is becoming very Orwellian.

I'm telling you why
Santa Claus is coming to town
Santa Claus is coming to town
Santa Claus is coming
Santa Claus is coming
Santa Claus is coming to town

Yes, he's coming, He's watching your every move for any sign of dissent. If you show any signs of dissent, you'll end up designated as "Naughty" on his all pervasive and meticulously complete list. What will happen to the dissidents?

The ultimate message?

Conform, even in your thoughts and heart of hearts, or suffer the consequences.